Here are 5 do-it-yourself grief therapy activities that really work.
I never did go to counseling – well I did, twice, that hardly counts. I was too embarrassed. That was probably a bad decision. A Christian counselor would pray with you and give Biblical insight and God-centered suggestions that would help and encourage forgiveness. A huge part of healing is forgiveness, which, by the way, is about your own heart and state of mind, not about the other person. It doesn’t change or affect them at all.
Non-Christian counselors are humanistic (person-centered, or more to the point self-centered.) They have a tendency to make you look back and dwell on what caused your troubles and how that makes you feel. A little of that goes a long way. In my humble opinion, when you are home alone with nothing but negative thoughts circling around in your head it only makes things worse. I my humble opinion, it would be much better to look forward, upward and outward.
1. By “forward” I mean concentrate on what you need to do today. When you are in deep with all these negative emotions and heartbreak all you can do is just manage one day at a time. (It will get better.) So plan what you need to do on this day, clean the bathroom, or work on your art journal, or start one. Keep your mind occupied (with good things) and your hands busy. I looked in the dictionary at the word “therapy”, definition number 4 said any act, hobby, task, program etc. that relieves tension. Cleaning house can be therapy, and certainly the act of making arts and crafts is therapy. You don’t have to draw stick figures of you family, or smear red and black paint on the canvas in order for it to be therapy.
2. By “upward” I mean keep looking to God. I remember feeling like God had abandoned me but I knew that God would never do that. Just because I couldn’t feel Him didn’t mean he wasn’t there. “For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord”. Romans 8:38-39 Read your Bible whether you feel like it or not. I found myself reading in Psalms a lot, just flipping around and reading here and there, but I knew that I needed to keep the line of communication with God open.
3. By “outward” I mean to look for ways to help other people. One of the best ways to make yourself feel better is to do something for someone else. Unless you have nerves of steel then I don’t suggest visiting your church’s shut-ins! But you can send get-well cards,
(Just don’t let any tears fall on the card.), or crochet baby blankets or bake cookies for church functions. And take time to pray for everyone on your churches prayer list, and pray for your minister and church leaders, by name.
4. Certainly don’t forget to use essential oils. Using them helped me so much!
5. Forgiveness is a huge part of the healing process. Ask God to forgive you of your sins, forgive yourself and forgive the ones that have hurt you, if you can’t then ask God to give you the strength to forgive.